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What Parents Want Comic Relief The Evolution of a Mother
What Parents Want Comic Relief The Evolution of a Mother
| The Evolution of a Mother |
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Maternity Clothes…1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes. Preparing for the birth…1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember, last time, breathing didn't do a thing. 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month The Layette…1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn's clothes in Neutral, colour co-ordinate them and fold them neatly in baby's little bureau.2nd baby: You check to make sure the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains. 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink can't they? Worries…1st baby: At the first sign of distress – a whimper, a frown – you pick up the baby.2nd baby: You pick up the baby when the wails threaten to wake your firstborn. 3rd baby: You teach your 3 year old how to rewind the mechanical swing. Dummy…1st baby: If the dummy falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home to wash and boil it.2nd baby: When the dummy falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle. 3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in. Nappies…1st baby: You change your baby's nappy every hour, whether they need it or not.2nd baby: You change their nappy every 2 – 3 hours, if needed 3rd baby: You try to change their nappy before others start to complain about the smell or when you see it sagging to their knees. Activities…1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Moms & Tots, Clamber Club, Kindermuziek and Baby Story Hour.2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics 3rd baby: You take your infant to Woolworths and the Dry Cleaner Going Out…1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave the number where you can be contacted 3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood. At Home…1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day gazing at the baby2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking or hitting the baby. 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children. Swallowing Coins…1st baby: When the first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to hospital and demand X-rays.2nd baby: You carefully watch for the coin to be passed. 3rd baby: When the third child swallows a coin, you deduct it from their pocket money. Source Unknown. |
Our clients said....
I applaud your efforts to organise parenting workshops, it's certainly a very worthy initiative. I … see it as one of the most important preventative steps a community can make towards safeguarding and optimizing the well-being of children.
Another great seminar, clear, practical, professional. It was excellent!more...
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